Friday, June 15, 2012

Freeper Madness' own troll!

I don't know how many of you have been reading the comments, but there has recently been a pretty awesome development down there. It seems we've got a troll!

 And not one of those lame refugees from the argument clinic.  Naw, this guy is straight up contentless abuse!

From what I can tell this guy started out in April 2012 thusly:
Have you stopped and considered the fact that FReepers simply don't like Romney ?

Of course not, you're a commie faggot who can't do a whit of his own original thinking.

---Absolutely Nobama
From there, though, he's only expanded his repertoire.  A random sampling, mostly from the past few days:

On my commie faggotude:
I'll cop to youth - born at the end of '79.

But do racists really need motivating these days?


You should also cop to being a commie faggot, but I digress. Please continue the 127,909,009,899,978,199th blog posting about how weally, weally wacist those whacky Wepublicans are. It's some ground breaking stuff. Your drunken whore of a mother must be proud.

---Dan Dreiberg
His extraordinary alchemy of scatalogical homophobia:
I don't see why your mother didn't abort you. Look at you. Blobs of AIDS patient diarrhea are more important to society than you.

Go suck some big, hairy, Muzzie dick.


---Moloch

 Responding to some constructive criticism:

In post after post he rails against "commie faggot liberals" as though that were the very epitome of insults. Make ya want to pat him on his nappy lil' head
Newsflash, Lib Child Molester: I don't use the term "commie faggot liberal" as an insult. It's a statement of fact, like the sky is blue, there's no such thing as "climate change", and 2+2=4.


Go sit on a cucumber.


---Comedian

PS:

"nappy lil' head" ?

I just luv it when pasty white liberals like to pretend that they're "down with the struggle", despite the fact the fact that they've never been within two feet of a black person. Get a grip. Not a grip on my dog's winky, mind you, but get a grip.

 His take on Obama:
BTW, did you know that you dumbasses elected a commie homosexual agenda pusher in '08 ? Since we're on the edge of complete and total disaster because of you commie faggot liberals, I'd say that's more important than Ayn Rand's social security.

But go ahead. Pretend to think you know it all.

Oh....before I forget.....Fuck you, fuck your mother, fuck your failure father, and fuck your fat ugly sister.

---Rorschach
I'm glad he didn't forget.

Detailing his hatred for liberals:
I wonder what the average blood pressure of Freepers is? This can't be healthy.

No more unhealthy than the random venereal diseases than you commie faggot liberals have. All that sucking and fucking you libs do to each others eventually has consequences.

You know, I really hate you commie faggot liberals. I really do. I hate the way you wander around telling everyone how tolerant you are, and yet, as a group, you're the most intolerant mother fuckers on the face of this planet. Personally, I wish all of you would swim the fuck back to North Korea with a worthless bureaucrat under each arm.

PS---I also hate your whore of a mother for allowing you to be born. Under most circumstances, I'm pro-life, but for worthless, disease-ridden faggots like yourself, I'm willing to look the other way. I personally think the world would have been a better place if you were aborted and tossed into a bio-hazard bag along with the abortionist's two day old tuna sandwich.


---Rorschach
Alas, the usual boilerplate strawman once you strip out the creative yet repetitive but still compelling insults.

But this guy is at his best when calling people gay:

I notice, Absolutely Nobama, that you skipped the Orly Tatiz thread. Please chime in on that one too.

How about I comment on your homosexuality, instead ? Personally, I think you're a pink wearing faggot who likes to catch more than pitch. I'll bet you beat your Barbie doll sock-like winky to a picture of Bill Caligula sucking on Hitlery's face.

Hey, you don't like what I just said ? Grab your rainbow flag and start a rally, you miserable hack.
Not just a faggot, a pink wearing faggot!

His response, still by favorite for the imagery of the dog-eating penis it contains:
Man, that was pretty funny. 'Pink wearing faggot?' You can't make that stuff up.

You know what's even funnier ? The fact that your blog sucks big, hairy dog-eating, Muslim dick.

You know what's even funnier than that ? The fact that your own parents hate you and your dog is tired of being raped by you.

---Absolutely Nobama

Oh....before I forget....FUCK YOU.
 But remember, we may be amused, but don't mistake his attention with affection!! he still totally hates us!
 I hate you motherfuckers. I hate everything you commie faggot pigs stand for. I hate what you've done to this country. I hate the lib mantra of "I'm special, you're special, we're all special fuckers." I hate the hack politicians you and your ilk have inflicted on the rest of us.

Now, go outside and play go fuck your crack whore of a mother.

---Rorschach
Whoa,veering close to substance with his "we're all special fuckers" bit.  It may be ten years out of date, but it's still an actual criticism...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------





Which brings us to the question of this guy's identity.  Some of the commenters have been trying to puzzle out which Freeper he is.

Lifetime champion commenter euphgeek posits Rome2000 based on the profanity.

MDaF suggests a Freeper named chrisser.

THe man himself weighs in as well:
Well, you'll never know, "MDaF". I might be a vicious Right Winger who wants to make your drunken whore of a grandmother pay for her own fucking pills.....OR.....I might be a harmless pothead who likes to disrupt pointless conversations after blazing a few bowls of top shelf Kronik.

You just never know.....


---Captain Axis

Captain Axis?  I mean, I've read Watchmen probably four times, and I had to look that guy up.  There was a Freeper named "The Comedian" who posted back in the day, but who has since been banned.

It's a shame, as that guy was the Monday Potpouri champion, it seems:


Though he did post as "V" last night, so maybe just an Alan Moore fan?  Or maybe..ALAN MOORE himself?!!

The rage fits, even if the politics don't....

Anyhow, I'm calling him The Comedian from now on, because he is hilarious!

28 comments:

  1. Meh. He's OK, I guess but I miss "Barry Soetoro"'s wild conspiracy theories more. The Comedian's just some douche yelling profanities at everyone. You can only use the word "faggot" so many times before it gets old.

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  2. I hope he sticks around. He's so precious.

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    Replies
    1. "I hope he sticks around. He's so precious."

      Well, I hate you. I hope your dog dies on the same day you get fired at the Golden Arches. Then, I hope some meanie capitalist forcloses on your little hovel.


      ---Dr. Manhattan

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    2. I know you hate me. Kisses! *Smooch*

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  3. Man did I miss this place (just got through moving), and I'm glad to see there's already a dick bag amongst us. You know what is going to really piss him off one day? When he realizes Alan Moore's political views are more in line with the Occupy movement than his own. That's gonna really suck for him... (Kinda like how we all suck dog dick, amirite?!)

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    Replies
    1. Welcome back TeethMD. You have to give Rorschach quite a bit of credit for rally this community. Most post would get 3 comments max, but now there's a post with 40 comments! Even myself only occasionally commented as Anon, but Rorschach motivated me to get named.

      One side note, I'm now convinced that Rorschach is actually Ozy, and all this was a plan to get us more involved. It would be a mind game Ozymandias could easily pull off.

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  4. If I'd just gotten on the Internets last week, I'd think this guy was funnier. But after 20-odd years of seeing closet-case rageaholics screech impotently about gay sex and scatology...who cares? It's about as interesting as watching a big, slow, dumb fly bump repeatedly against a window.

    I know actual gay people who think about gay sex less obsessively than this guy does. It's boring, and possibly even a little sad. After a certain point, all you can do is hope the poor schmuck comes out of the closet and gets on with his life.

    If you ask me, FReepers are a lot more entertaining when they're talking amongst themselves, trying to one-up each other with florid conspiracy theories and Internet Tough Guy posturing. All we're getting here is standard-issue sexually retarded playground taunts. Like I said, that shit's gotten pretty stale after 20 years of Internet "conversation."

    I do see the humor in this knucklehead thinking he can disrupt a blog compiling FReeper quotes by calling people gay commies and wishing death on them. (Talk about carrying coals to Newcastle!) And I guess it's mildly amusing that he can't seem to accept his own powerlessness to offend...but then, this type never can. So I second what Anon 1 says: Meh. Don't care if he stays, don't care if he goes.

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  5. I always, always laugh when these guys say "Muzzies". That sounds so remarkably nonthreatening. Like an adorable animal friend who talks with you when no one's looking. I'm less scared of muslims than I've ever been thanks to "Muzzies". How sweet.

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  6. On a serious sidenote Ozy, why are you looking through Free Republic? Sure they might have crazy conspiracy theories and sometimes live in an alternative world, but think about whats really at hand here. They are just crazy and bitter because of the horrifying modern world we live today that liberalism (progressivism, marxism, communism, what ever you call it) created.

    Back in my day, life was tough too. Good and honest problem solvers were few, most people just didn't care and there was no shortage of trouble makers.

    Nowadays with liberalism, things are much much worst. People are actually brainwashed into believing that right is wrong and wrong is right. The problem solvers are trouble makers and vice-versa !

    In the economic sphere liberalism teaches laziness and dishonesty and scolds hard work.
    In the social sphere it celebrates sexual acts to horrifying to even speak of, to the point of wanting to make marriage accommodate these perversions! Normal girls are encouraged to be violated by monkeys ! The natural beauty of a woman is being raped by wild animals !!

    It terrifies me more than anything that nowadays nobody can wake up and see what has become of America.

    How can you Ozy, someone smart enough to have read william blake, can't see what liberalism is doing to the world ? Freepers are only trying to hide the pain away

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    1. OK, you almost had me believing that you were going to be serious here. But this post is too funny! Girls encouraged to be raped by monkeys? Homosexuality is too horrifying to even speak of? You had me giggling by the end. Not laughing out loud like Rorschach/Nobama/TheComedian, but I still laughed.

      Delete
    2. Alright, I'll address things seriously for a bit. Paragraph by paragraph, then!

      1. I can't say why I enjoy reading Free Republic so much. I think it may be related to how much I enjoy bad movies. But there is no denying that Freepers and their ilk do have a nontrivial amount of power these days.
      Liberalisim is hardly controlling the modern world, though. Indeed, they're pretty pissed off at the moment. Freepers are extremists, and think everything that isn't them, from Neo-Cons to most Republicans, is liberal.

      2. The world has gotten better, though. One of the throughlines of liberalism is giving voice to the voiceless. Sure, when blacks couldn't vote and had no freedom of speech, things seemed simpler. But they were not better.

      The 1950s ideal is not a real thing, never was. Sure, some things have gotten worse - drugs, income inequality. But Americans are living longer and in vastly more comfort. And there are certainly more opportunities for more people than back then. The trajectory of history may be long, but it curves towards justice.

      3. You can't just proclaim you're right and that everyone who disagrees with you is brainwashed. Such is the unproductive rhetoric of dogma - a tonic for the troops, but useless otherwise.

      4. Quite the strawman here. Liberals believe that people shouldn't die because they are poor. To be sure, policies that do this suffer from lazy free riders, but they help the downtrodden as well. One cannot simply focus on those unjustly enriched while ignoring how people are helped.
      A social safety net is a sign of a civilization that takes care of it's own. Reform it? Sure, but end it? Victorian England is a pretty good example of what happens then.
      Socially, homosexuality isn't about who you screw, it's about who you love. And anal sex isn't just for homos anyhow!
      The monkeys thing I may need a citation for. I trust it's not a miscegenation thing?

      5. I'm sorry you're unhappy, but shit changes. I'll wager if you were a century older, you'd be just as shocked at the depravity of the 1910s.

      6. The world does not turn upon liberalism, or progresivism, or Blake or any one thing. Blame Marx all you want, but evil existed long before him and existed long after. The very fact that you indict a single philosophy as the root of all woe should make you suspicious of your objectivity.
      Smart, learned people can disagree about the world. To declare you have the objective reasonable truth, and everyone of any intelligence should see it means you live in a world much different from the complex practicalities of reality.
      Freepers hiding the pain away through anger seems about right, but even their pain seems to me silly overreaction to trifles and change.

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    3. hmmm how may i illuminate you better on what I mean by "monkey"... liberals better to use the term african american

      Delete
    4. If you believe that a snake tricked a woman into eating an apple therefore homosexuality is wrong, your morals are irrelevant. If you believe a man turned water into wine therefore God, you're easily deceived. I visit FR because it's amazing to see people so enslaved by the figments of their imaginations.

      Also if you think America worse now than it was in the past, you're dead wrong. America generates more wealth and opportunities in a single day than King David could have ever imagined. A lib like me just wants to make sure that everyone gets a chance to access that wealth and opportunity. Freepers seem to think success is genetic, but if it was you would be able to name Bill Gates's parents and all of the Koch brothers' children. Contributors and leaches come from every walk of life, but use commies just want to make sure contributors get the support they need, and leaches don't pull society down too much.

      D&G just saw your monkey reply. With hatred like that in your heart, you're actually lucky there is no God.

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    5. Well put. I really was left somewhat speechless at the monkey bit.

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    6. You keep on pegging me as some sort of christian fundamentalist. I am nothing of the sort.
      America is better today because there is more wealth ? But what is more wealth worth if the country has lost its moral compass? Growing up south Africa, i fully understand the importance of always protecting the values that made a country strong and what a disaster befalls a country once it loses it.
      First in happened over there, now its happening in the USA

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    7. Here's a hint: your personal moral compass isn't everyone else's, but that doesn't mean the world is going to descend into chaos.

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    8. You sound like a fundamentalist to me, but ok maybe you're a twice a year Christian.

      Give me a rational argument against the morality of homosexual acts without using religious dogma. Give me a rational argument against interracial couples without being racist.

      Requirements:
      1. You have to acknowledged Barack Obama is President of the US.
      2. You cannot use any of Alan Turing's inventions.

      Delete
    9. Ha ha, South Africa huh. How'd that apartheid work out for your economy?

      You were crushed by an international boycott and the government resigned in disgrace. No, your ideology died in 1945. Follow your leader. Kill yourself.

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    10. "Give me a rational argument against the morality of homosexual acts without using religious dogma"
      Homosexuals were heavily persecuted in atheistic communist regimes like the Soviet Union. Fortunately evil often persecutes evil.

      Again you bring religion, something I have never mentioned. How obsessed are you with your anti-christianity that you see it everythere? You're argument that there is no god makes you as irrational as a religious person. God isn't even a well defined concept to begin with, whether he exists is none of our interest.

      Actually South Africa was doing fine. A communist driven UN imposed sanctions and enforced boycotts on a nation that was only protecting itself from the wilderness it found itself in. Try going anywhere in africa today and see what a mess a place is when the rightful masters have long abandoned the place.

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    11. "Homosexuals were heavily persecuted in atheistic communist regimes like the Soviet Union. Fortunately evil often persecutes evil." That's a completely irrelevant conclusion, a red herring, historically inaccurate, and most of all you didn't give me a rational argument. I don't care about your religion but explain why is homosexuality is morally wrong. Also I don't want to hear the children and animals bullshit argument; non-consensual, inconscient sexual encounters will always be rape.

      "Actually South Africa was doing fine." Is SA being ruined by interracial relationships, or is it doing fine? You dodged my second question, and you used a machine invented by the homosexual Alan Turing.

      You're arguments are a mess, you move goal post, and most of all you've never answered why your title is D&G.

      **I'm not anti-Christianity, but I'm against superstition becoming law. "God isn't even a well defined concept to begin with..." defining God and God's wishes is the goal of all religions, but imaginations come to different conclusions so it seems undefined. If I said I worshipped Zeus you would laugh, but there's no more compelling proof of Yahweh, Allah, or Vishnu. I will not believe in the unseeable until there is repeatable, verifiable data.

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  7. Hey, Ozy, you may have seen this one already, but the Pentagon is holding a gay pride month in June. Watch the Freepers go ballistic:

    http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2895403/posts

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  8. Of course he does! Thanks to Obama, those permits are automatically handed out with your driver's license. Didn't you get one?

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  9. You forgot your name, Watchmen Guy.

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  10. Detective Johnny Conny here.

    Sir, stand aside. This is an official internets investigation and no expense is being spared. It is Friday and we all want to go back to our animu and warez and the sooner we get this sorted out the better. Euph is saying that they have the required permits so we might just leave it at that.


    For now.

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  11. ".... can you help D&G out a little?"

    No, I'm a solo act. And yes, Zimmerman is innocent. Fuck Trayvon Martin.


    ---Alan Moore Ripped Off Orwell

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  12. This guy is obviously ashamed of his own closeted homosexuality.

    I want him to know that if he leaves the closet and embraces his true nature, we will forgive him for his humorous insults.

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  13. Yeah, you call them "Dad" and "Grandpa".

    So what if I did?

    Not being a twisted closet case like yourself, I don't read "gay" as a pejorative. To me, it has about as much emotional content as "red-haired." if you can figure out why I wouldn't be offended by someone yelling "your dad has red hair," you'll be a little closer to figuring out why your little rants are so weak and toothless.

    Better trolls, please.

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  14. Commie Faggot Liberal -> CFL -> Compact Fluorescent Lighting; has a nice ring to it, doncha think? Let him go a little longer and he may work his way up to Purity Of Essence.

    One more note on the CFL; He really needs to re-order the words. Commie -> noun or adjective. Faggot -> pretty much a noun. Liberal -> noun or adjective although I would prefer adjective.

    Retry it as Commie Liberal Faggot.

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