Friday, May 3, 2013

Friday Spotlight: Lazamataz


Free Republic's notorious wag, I first noticed him when he was mocking Freepers who were saying America's economy would be completely destroyed in 2008:
No, its even worse than that. Not only will the American economy be completely destroyed, but the entire universe will 'wink' out of existance.
Then comes the tough times.
Amusing! But, alas, most of his antics are not nearly so sane, and there is no shortage of hate-filled rants either. Still, he seems jolly and doesn't take things too seriously, so there is that.


Old and slightly smutty jokes!
Actually, I turned tri-sexual.

If a woman wants to try anything sexual, I’ll do it. :)
Cynicism is sort of like wit...
Worst career prospects:

1) Congressional and Senate Ethics Officer.
2) Media Accuracy and Fact Checker.
3) Heterosexual Marriage Counselor.
4) Gunsmith.
I hadn't heard this one before, but it feels vintage 1980s:
I hate being bipolar. IT’S AWESOME!!!!
An old Freeper joke is that Laz would "hit it" with all women. It's funny because he's not Bill Clinton!
I’d hit it.

Dude... really?

I mean... really? Have you seen the “whole picture” here?

The minute I saw her I knew I could not go on without hitting that.
I can't tell if he's joking in response to a Canadian wanted add for a 'non-Caucasian:
It started this way in Nazi Germany, too.
Not joking about what he thinks about McCain:
McCainiac is not senile. McCainiac is not foolish. McCainiac is not Republican or Neocon.

McCainiac is a Communist liberal Democrat Islamic-loving America-hating Marxist Gungrabbing Piece of SHIT.

Some people say "John McCain, thank you for your service in the Air Force, but...."

*I* say, "John McCain, f*** you for your horrible, incompetent service in the Air Force where you repeatedly wrecked aircraft, then got your sorry ass handed to you by the Vietnamese and got shot down, then collaborated with the enemy to get special privileges when a Prisoner of War. You are a piece of shit and a disgrace to the uniform, and you were turned into a dedicated American-Hating Communist by your Vietnamese captors."
He begrudgingly likes the recent 'Steven Spielberg's "Obama"' clip:
I give these a-holes the tiniest bit of credit for a decent sense of humor.
But yeah, his worldview fits right in with his fellows:
You COMPLETELY underestimate the ability of liberals to divorce themselves from reality.

They will simply declare that it is the fault of George W. Bush and the NRA, and - voila -- they are happy with the world again.
Ahh, complete lack of nuance helps indict liberals nuanced views.

He may not be the wittiest, but he's all Freepers have. And as I said before, the mere fact that he is willing to take things less seriously and not wallow in rage all the time is nice to see.

12 comments:

  1. I have never seen the appeal of this guy. He is not funny. I just don't get the fascination with this guy by freepers. They go gaga over him . His jokes are not funny but in most cases just plain stupid. Sorry Oxy.

    So sick of reading "Laz would hit it" (as well as the repetitive posting of Helen Thomas pics and guilty or not guilty.)


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    1. Funny is relative. He is the funniest Freeper...

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    2. I actually love the dry humor of "stuartcr". The guy just pushes in the knife slowly into idiotic freepers...just enough eeehhh but not enough to get zotted. Stuartcr has to be rolling when he post.

      New freeper O.E.O though is on borrowed time though..Laz say's he is "watching him". I predict he will be zotted within a week or less.

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  2. Laz, like humblegunner, is firmly positioned in JimRob's "good ol' boy" network.
    So, not only is he "protected", but the old-lady freepathon coven has to bend over backward pretending Laz is cute and funny too.

    Laz had a chance to have a real girlfriend once, but then he realized that might require him to take a washcloth to his pits and ass for once in his life, and he decided it wasn't worth it.

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  3. Freeper jongalstr just went bonkers on his own vanity thread and the mods pulled it. When the majority of freepers on the thread told him to get back on his meds..well you know he is really nuts.

    This is what I could save..


    I quit. I will only live to defend myself. You all will have to take care of yourselves.
    Friday, May 03, 2013 1:52:10 PM · by jongaltsr · 40 replies
    I have tried (in vain) to get commitments from every source I could find to organize defense teams, self preservation information groups. I Tried. I Failed. I now quite and will depend on my own abilities. I may survive, I may not. At least I will be trying. You (99.9% of you) will die, be imprisoned or join the opposition out of sheer lack of any other option. I won't wish you luck. I wish you to suffer and for most of you to die or be killed for then and only then will you possibly be motivat4ed to fight...

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    1. Lol, his account is now zotted.

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    2. I'm not surprised he was zotted. Yesterday he said it was time to start shooting all politicians...yes, it was that clear. No ambiguity.

      The guy is unhinged and rimjob made him ride the rail..

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    3. Wow. His history ends on Monday with a call to impeach McCain. Other than that, the usual semi-paranoid stuff.

      These days Freepers have put themselves under a lot of pressure.

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    4. Well sure, JonGaltSr decided to form his own one-man militia and kill all them dern commie liberals, but can you blame the man after the terrors that he's endured at the hands of the Obama government? Just look at this!

      http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2756443/posts

      "A couple of hours ago receive a hard knock on the door. I answered the door and about 7 or 8 agents all flashing badges (claiming to be FBI and/or CIA) rushed me and pushed me against the far wall.

      My dog attacked and they would have shot him had I not broken free for a second and covered him by laying him on the floor beneath me.

      After things calmed down a bit and I received assurances that nothing would happen to him if I placed him in the bedroom and closed the door.

      I did so and they then read me my rights and explained that my opinions expressed on Free Republic were the reason they were there. I had expressed my opinion of what I thought of the current President and the majority in congress and was therefore a potential threat to the government. After what seemed to be hours they came to the conclusion (I hope) that I was merely expressing my opinion and not a leader of a counter revolutionary army - as they saw it.

      They searched my apartment for weapons and found 4 (which I have not fired in over a year or more) and they seized them for testing. My dog (Ranger) was not happy with the situation so I had to hold on to him during the search to keep him from being shot.

      They also seized my computer and downloaded my entire files system. I suppose they also copied any files erased by normal erasure techniques. They returned the computer as "WAS" (as far as I can tell) but I after careful consideration the past few hours I have concluded that they are monitoring me closely.

      I'm not even sure this message will make it through but what else can I do but try?

      If (Big IF!) this does make it through, beware. They are watching and may make a visit to your residence and give your the same routine.

      It really shook me up and I have trouble keeping my nerves steady and my thoughts straight as I write this message.

      Once this gets out (IF THIS GETS OUT) I can pretty much expect their return but this time they probably won't be quite as considerate of myself and my dog who they will probably shoot on sight.

      I have packed my truck with essentials but I suspect that there are those that are watching so I may not make it to one of my favorite mountain camping sites.

      There I will not have any communications except when I get into town and use WIFI to make any contact.

      Good luck and keep your heads down.

      They have become serious about enforcing their new powers - and some of us might not make it.

      I'll probably be #1 on their list.

      Semper Fi and God Bless one and all."

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    5. Nice find. Freepers don't take him too seriously then either. And he was briefly zotted, and then un-zotted it seems.

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  4. From his page it looks like he is in Narcotics Anonymous or AA. He posted the 12 steps and calls them "his friends".

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    Replies
    1. He is. He sent me a wonderful message once when I was having a really bad day. Laz isn't all bad.

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